Stress Management | Ice Cracking Under Your Feet | subMrs Feelings

Stress Management

Ice Cracking Under Your Feet

Sir, Do it Until I’m Me Again……

d/s-m,HusDom, Sir Do it Until I'm me again,Stress Management, submission, subMrs, subMrs Feelings


STRESS, it is always going to be around.  Learning how to use your D/s-M to help with that stress is the key, stress management.  Letting it go, giving the stress over to your husDOM is essential. Communication Verbal or Physical, let him pull you from the ice.  


Sometimes things whether it be a bad situation or your attitude or just stresses in our everyday lives, you feel like things are out of control.  You need to feel grounded again.   Some want completely broken and then put back together. subMrs feelings, shattering like glass, ice breaks under your feet.
Things are spiraling out of control and your falling through the air… But it never ends. Your feet never get to touch the ground. It goes on and on. Even if you let go, let it roll and sit back.  You stand on ice as it is cracking under your feet. What do you do?  Do you act out?  Maybe withdrawal?  You become a shadow of what you were, empty and a lost soul. You have to give the control of the stress away. But you fight it….. Why?

Your Dominant may not see it at first, he will feel you and or your behavior change.  Your Dom will want to fix it.  He will want to face it, act on it.  Break it down for you into smaller bites.  You will fight against him.  Remember he is not the enemy.  You won’t grasp his hand at first because you are in the dark, not able to see.   You twist and turn until he meets you where you need him to. He will hold you down and look deeply into your eyes, pierce your soul and pull out what he desires.   Finally, you hand it to him, submit.  You’ll beg him,  please Sir, fix me… The ice is too cold and you are afraid to drown.  Sir, reach in take my heart, hold it and make it beat in rhythm with yours again. Tear me down so you can build me back again. He will choose his weapon for war. You hurt so bad inside that you will accept whatever he chooses. Battles are fought and bruises you will bare. Many cleansing tears have fallen. But when it’s done and the smoke has cleared. You are new again. The fog has lifted and warmth of the sun’s rays touch you once again.  Your feet are firm. Your mind at peace. This time you look into his eyes and speak your truth.

Thank You, Sir. I am me again…..


Comment, tell me your experience…. HUGS!




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  1. It just came tumbling out… Thank you for your kind words. ❤

  2. I love this post so much…it is one I read when ever I feel like things are getting out of control…to remind me to ask Sir to set me “right” again. Please Sir, get me in mindset…remind me of my role in all of this. It’s amazing how quickly a good spanking or flogging will just quiet my mind and put me back into role when I spiral….it makes me “V” again…definitely!

    1. Thank You Jezz for commenting.. I am glad you liked it. It is one of my oldest posts 2013… I renewed it and posted it again… HUGS! LK

    2. Thanks Jezz… It was a post that meant a lot and still I cum back to once in a while for my own reminders.. HUGS! Please keep commenting! LK

  3. This post could not have been better timed. Recently I have been experiencing a lot of stress with vanilla life situations (relating to my car repairs and home and yard maintenance) that have impacted my level of submission. Wanting to take care, take conotrol of the situations and resolve the problems like I did in the days before D/s-M. Feeling the need to take on the burden so that it is done timely and done right. This thought is poison and puts doubt in my mind about Sir’s ability. This was driving a wedge between me and My Sir, even though he did not bring it up. (I am sure he noticed). I was feeling this great tugging from side to side. Telling my self on one hand ” I need to submit and let him take control of the situations and accept the way in which he handles it ” and on the other hand ” If I don’t take care of these situations, it may not get done or it might get worse” Getting the internal strength to surrender the control was very difficult, challenging and STRESSFUL. But I knew that trying to keep control was going back to vanilla and that is not where I want to go. I have since let go of the control of these situations so that Sir can step in and handle them. Somehow, the internal stress still remains as he works through the solutions to the situations. I am inspired by this post to ask Sir to do what the post suggests:
    ” You’ll beg him, please Sir, fix me… The ice is too cold and you are afraid to drown. Sir, reach in take my heart, hold it and make it beat in rhythm with yours again. Tear me down so you can build me back again. ”
    I need to not only release control of the situations physically but also mentally and emotionally and reconnect us.
    And that is what I will ask my Sir tonight to fix me; to release the stress and control in my mind and emotions and make me whole again.
    The last line in my Submissive’s Prayer is ” It is my greatest wish, my highest power to make him complete as he makes me”
    I find this line a perfect reflection of my goal and to ask Sir to fix me.

    1. This post was one of my originals and it still touches me all the time.. I reposted it and put in an updated pic… It really is a message within a message for all subbies.
      HUGS! LK

    2. I am so glad that the post touched you and inspired you in this way. The job of the post was really for this exact thing. I was touched in a way to write it like this and then later touch others that feel the deep feelings that subMrs sometimes do. Glad it touched you today! LK

  4. This was wonderful timing LK. I’ve been working on my submission and what we talked about last regarding my phrasing in regards to Sirs and my discussions. I’m currently under some elevated stresses with my job and have been doing better with letting go there. However, Sir and I had the same discussion as last time this week and this round I was able to give up a little of the control and accept his choice in how he wanted to tackle the issue. It hurt to do that as I was raised to take care of what needs to be done, but at the same time it was freeing. You seem to have an innate sense when we subs need a guiding hand. i asked Sir to help me out of the ice last night and he said he was there and always will be.

    1. Yeah!! zlfjgrildjfg.jdl/fj, sorry couldn’t help myself! I am so happy that you communicated and that you were able to break the issue down. Stress and anxiety is always there but doesn’t it feel great that you have a true partner in it and you do not or have the expectation that you do it alone ? HUGS! CONGRATS! LK

      1. Thanks LK. It really is feeling amazing. I know that the ice will crack and I may fall again, but knowing that Sir is there to give me his hand and help certainly takes some of the pressure off. 😉 laksdfi hehehe…

        1. dfcjeo;icf;ojuscd;osjd;lf*uck… fior;fvjv;lz… Use your subbie tools… Get back up and walk again..

          HUGS! LK

  5. I love you and this post.
    I am so glad you reposted this…
    I had forgotten about it and this couldn’t have been better timed since we just had a pretty brutal (honest) conversation about our dynamic and how I felt like he just sat there, recently, and let me spiral out of control. I didn’t realize how affected he was as well, so I begged him to make me, “V” again the other night and he of course, has obliged.


  6. This is a lot like where I’ve been for the last 2 years since having a baby… not me. I’ve been a shadow of who I used to be. Our start into D/s has brought back so much of that fire I used to have. I used to feel so sexy and I had sexual prowess, but it’s been so long, I feel rusty. It’s coming back but every time we have a set back I have to remind myself of this. Life. It’s what it is! But it always flows the way you direct it. I know what I need to focus on and it will decide how it turns out.

    1. Sugar, I am glad to hear from you! It is just recommitting to making your marriage number one again, hard to do after a little one comes along. Kiddos have to take that seat for a while. I wish you the best and you’re always welcum to PM me with anything you need.
      HUGS! LK

  7. I read this article few days ago and just came back to read it again today. I’m so stressed out right now. I feel like I could just cry it out, but I’m also so exhausted that the tears won’t come. It’s like I need to have Sir MAKE me cry just so that I can get it out of my system. Know what I mean? How do you go about asking for that? How do you get your Sir to coax those healing tears out of you?

  8. What a wonderful post and reminder LK. Sometimes we just need our Sir’s to reset us and take control and handle the situation before it gets out of control and we spiral down a rabbit hole.

  9. Lovely post, LK. It’s a great reminder that our Sirs want to help us, they want to be fixers and take care of things. I find myself feeling guilty when I am getting stressed out because he works so incredibly hard at his day job and I don’t want to put extra on top of him. So I keep to myself more than I should, not wanting to increase his personal stress worrying about me/us.

    1. Meaux, I agree we try to protect, that’s what we do. Mr Fox and I talk about that every once in a while and to tell the total truth, he likes the thought I put into trying to help in that manner. Saying that, he also said that he wants me to lean on him and let him chew things up make them smaller for me to swallow whenever I feel things coming in on me….. So, overall, we take it case by case and I focus on how to keep us both fed and happy with our dynamics. Thanks for commenting. Please do more! HUGS! LK

      1. That’s one of the bonuses of this lifestyle, yes? The devotion to working on the relationship through things like active communication and honesty. This has been an incredible opportunity for personal growth for me (and I suspect for him) and an area that will need continual work after years of handling everything ourselves, side by side.

  10. I trying to guide my sir husband since I am the one asking for him to be my dom I had him read this LK you can explain exactly how I feel way better than I can lol I have sent him the link to husdom several times now with just the message please sir

    1. subYes, this is exactly why I do what I do… to help others find their way through their journey into submission. I am so happy to help. HUGS! LK

  11. Thanks Mica, this post has been in my arsenal since the beginning and it stays true no matter how long or deep you are in D/s-M….

    HUGS! LK

  12. My Sir and I have an almost long distance relationship where we can only meet every few weeks. Sometimes when stress and life builds up so much, I feel very desperate in reaching out and calling to my Sir. It’s something we’re still working on in this dynamic of life. Thank you for this post, it shows that I’m not alone on these feelings too 🙂

    1. LittleKitty, I am happy that I can help you in your journey as a submissive. As you see our focus is on Married submission but in that the site still welcums any sub that would like to stop in and pull inspiration from all of the great info this site has to offer. Please feel free to add to any of the forums about how your journey came to be or how it is progressing. I know we have other entries about LDR’s in the forum, use the search box and type in LDR or long distance and see what pops up for you there. HUGS! LK

  13. This article was helpful LK, I’m currently dealing with managing my stress and anxiety a lot right now. How you mentioned giving my stress over completely to my Dom is helpful I rlly need to work on that. Maybe that’s why I’m a sub I just can’t handled stress well at all on my own. Lol.

    1. Sharing all your emotions is a biggie in D/s-M… Its all about being vulnerable and giving all of you to your Sir.
      “Maybe that’s why I’m a sub I just can’t handled stress well at all on my own.” Lol…. This I have to disagree about…
      Being a subMrs will make you stronger. The dynamic shows you how to be your own person and gives you a place, your husDOM to pull strength from. You will find all the major relationship foundations within our methods. This just gives you tools to find a person inside yourself that you may have never been able to be before. Wish you the best! LK

  14. Hey LK,

    Truly inspiring post, but then again from what i have read they all are! (I found your site a few days ago and have been going through it every chance i get! He-he)

    My Lord and i are still very new to this life stye, we are rather vanilla except for the bedroom (My mother raised me to always be self reliant, she and my father raised me within the business world, so i am still working through a lot of my old habbits when it comes to other activity’s).

    Anyway, the situation is that at the moment my Lord is under alot of stress, we are long distance for the next 3 months with erratic and last minute visits. my Lord has undertaken the care of his Grandfather who has fallen ill.

    With my limited experience and knowledge, how would i go about relieving my Lords stress and how would i do that (even in the slightest) long distance?
    my Lord always calls or Skype’s with me for a minimum of an hour every night, the time of when is not set as we are both in business for ourselves. Because of this, communication through out the day is difficult and generally i will still be in my office and being in this environment, -or just having just arrived at my flat- i find it very hard to get into the correct mind set.
    The distance kills me and i turn very vanilla when we are apart. How do i get into the correct mindset and how can i help my Lord best?

    Thankyou for this awesome blog by the way! It’s amazing to find a community of wisdom such as this!

    1. Jedi, Hello welcum to the site! The answers to most your questions lay inside your Dominant. The things you asked me, please ask him in your next skype downtime. Sit ask him “What is it Sir I can do to subport you?” He may give you those answers. Learn to listen with subMrs ears. He says I wish I could or do or have…. Then write it down and make it happen somehow. He will appreciate your thoughts the most, even if he says there is nothing, the thought counts! But use those subbie ears.. you will find answers there as well. These may,,,
      Thank you for your kind words! Again, welcum!

  15. Today I needed this post. Juggling busy schedules, feeling isolated from family and friends, worrying about the future. It came to a head this morning and the Ice cracked…I cried…and I didn’t reach for the hand Mhac offered me.