Formal Acceptance | How to ask for a Dominance and submission
-FORMAL ACCEPTANCE-
How Do I ask for Dominance and submission
BEFORE YOU DO YOUR FORMAL ACCEPTANCE: The Preparation……. Do your homework!
How do I get started in D|s?
How do you ask my husband for Dominance and submission?
Where do you start? Preparation! Why do preparation? Well, no one knows your husband like you do. You know how much preparation he needs before trying to open him up to something new. The preparation you do prior to doing your Formal Acceptance is key. I can tell you some things you can do to prepare you and him for the almost ceremonial “Formal Acceptance”.
- You can find the definitions of all things BDSM on Wiki or just google them. Many terms are defined on subMrs by putting them in the search box. You do this so you can familiarize yourself with definitions in this lifestyle. Make sure you know what D|s is..what BDSM is… What is a submissive & Dominant. What is Dominance and submission?
- Look through some soft bdsm porn and bookmark sites. You can show him what it is you’re wanting to act out. DO NOT GO TO SCARY PLACES WITH HIM! You will scare him away. (Again, you know what’s in his tastes.)
- Copy excerpts from your favorite BDSM related books. Copy/Print this site’s blog posts and husDOM.com posts that describe how to begin. Yes DO your homework.
- Get a lineup of BDSM images to show him. You can google BDSM images (Tumblers). Make sure NOT to shock him with any of this. Make it BDSM light if needed..Some husDOM’s to be broken in gently.
*You by now have prepared him letting him know that you have read and like the dynamics that BDSM entails. Now you have to pick the right time. This night/day should happen when you have time alone. Kiddo’s are fast asleep in their beds. Maybe he can sweep you away to a hotel for the weekend. You are cleaning up for the night, both showering…step out early. Lighting and soft music will help your cause. Make sure you smell and feel like heaven. Wear a robe only. Remove the robe and kneel to ask for what you desire. Try not to let him get any idea what you’re up to.
This is where you have to get all your bravery and angst and swallow it in and get your first taste of a sub-mindset. You can do it! Wait until you know he is coming into room.. or once he comes into room. Take his hand .. make sure he is seated on bed or standing and ask him if you can speak with him about something very important to you. Kneel or be kneeling…. take off the robe and kneel in front of him. Ask him to not speak let you talk please… before he says anything. Kneel ask him “Please Sir, I have an ache inside…… Will you be my Dominant? Then stop… LISTEN! One of the best tools a subMrs needs!
Let him absorb what you just asked. Wait for his answer……. How can he say no…? He sees your commitment… You’re naked on your knees. He may ask those questions that you are now prepared to answer. He may ask things that you do not know. Perfect answer to those questions is I will find out or let’s find out together. Tell him you want the lifestyle roles, what it would feel like to you to have it. The dynamics of D\s-M, married Dominance and submission is different then regular D/s. D|s-M is based on Honest Communication… Now if needed is the time to clear the slate. I should say most of the time 99% the Sir says yes… Then some fun play happens. Our partners are more pliable after sex… so have that fun then talk about it some more. Tell him you can help guide him the first phases. Working together you can have the magic… Tell him he will have responsibilities as you will and you both will have some of the best sex you have ever had.
This is your first step. You make sure to do this formal acceptance and it will clear up all the “I thought you meant something else” or ” I thought you meant this”. You make your expectations clear at this time so there is no confusion on what his part is in all this is. Make sure to let him know that D|s-M is a “TEAM” sport, in other words you both will have to learn and grow in your roles. Take it slow, make it simple at first, have fun learning together. It should not be hard all the time. This will be magic! Start in Bedroom, I did . D|s-M will come out when it wants and you can take it where ever you wish!
Best subMrs Wishes,
Little Kaninchen
Pd Image
2014, 2019
