Protocols & Rules | Domination and submission Married Lifestyle

Protocols & Rules in Domination and submission Married Lifestyle, Sex, Aggressive Passion

Protocols & Rules in Domination and submission

Married Lifestyle

“What exactly are protocols?

The strict and general dictionary definition would be, “a code prescribing strict adherence to a pre-determined etiquette.” In a BDSM setting, protocols are the rules of behavior or rituals that can be used by couples, groups and communities.  These rules can govern one’s or a groups bodies, behaviors and perspectives.

What about protocols in D/s-M, the Domination and submission married lifestyle?

Today,  D/s-M is a new method to an age old practice that’s currently being practiced more on a main stream power-exchange stage.  The stage brought to us by the books/movies from the Fifty Shades of Grey Trilogy.  The D/s-M we have created is what happens after Christian and Anastasia got married, fast forward 20 years.

There couldn’t possibly be a universal set rules (protocols) for every couple.  Every couple has their own unique connection, no two are ever the same. Each couple in D/s-M, gets to negotiate their protocols together. These are built on over time.  We encourage you to make these protocols as a team  and build on them as you get more experienced in your own dynamics. When you first begin, start with only a couple protocols that are easily achievable. No sense in setting yourselves up for failure when you have just begun. I know every husDOM and subMrs is very excite to prove themselves in their new roles look at D/s-M rules, rituals and protocols as an elephant that you CAN NOT eat all at once. This elephant you eat one small bite at a time.

low, Medium & HIGH Protocols

Protocols can be based on three levels, low, Medium and HIGH.  They can be assigned in your daily D/s-M as well as special “outside” protocols.  Outside, meaning outside your general dynamics or outside your bedroom or home.

What is generally called “low protocol” is a relaxed, mostly informal with few rules and restrictions. A “medium protocol” has some detailed rules governing parts of your behaviors and actions.  A “high protocol” is where most if not all of your activities have instructions and have a very in-depth and thorough set of rules.

For examples of rules and rituals please register for Premium subMrs account and see the linked post.

subMrs Wishes,




Registered subMrs

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Protocols in Domination and submission Married Lifestyle


  1. LK,
    Thank you for this post. I know it took my Sir and I a while to actually put rules in place. Finding rules that were meaningful to both of us. I wanted very high protocol and specific rules but my Sir is just not that type of person. He prefers a low protocol. In the end, I think we settled somewhere in the middle. As you said, everyone is different and we should do what works best for our dynamic!