Societies Beautiful Lie | Vanilla Marriage vs Domination and submission Marriage

Beautiful Lie

~Beautiful Lie

 

Little Kaninchen loves 30 Seconds to Mars…. They make me think… think about D/s.

I was listening to another song and it inspired me to write this. I feel like this song is talking about a vanilla marriage, my vanilla marriage. Mr Fox and I always had a great marriage.  Sir and I were the couple that had that special something.. He put me up on that pedestal. He was always the Dominant one. I was always submissive. This changed as years went by.

We had children and suddenly I live for them only. My husband he works to make sure we have a home and everything we needed. I worked and he worked constantly to achieve the things that we are told that we should want, the big house the cars, kids and private schools. We lost us…. There was a power struggle due to he traveled for work. I was “the boss” when he was not there. I had to be strong because I was both parents 75% of the time… Boy, I was wrong… The more I fought for control the more miserable I became…The more robotic our marriage became. Sex was once a month and was also very vanilla. Communication became yelling and accusing to the point we couldn’t communicate about anything important. I was lost and sad… I felt betrayed… The dream was dashed. The almost perfect marriage we both worked for was slipping out of our fingers… It was a Beautiful Lie…. We fell for it… We worked our ass’ of for what?…..Just to end up strangers and empty nest divorcee’s… UGH!

I was disappearing, I was checking out….. UNTIL… I read something, a book……

Fifty Shades of Grey. I read and read and read…. HEY, I can have this… and I did! 

Lyrics to A Beautiful Lie:

Lie awake in bed at night
And think about your life
Do you want to be different?
Try to let go of the truth
The battles of your youth
‘Cause this is just a game

It’s a beautiful lie
It’s a perfect denial
Such a beautiful lie to believe in
So beautiful, beautiful lie makes me

It’s time to forget about the past
To wash away what happened last
Hide behind an empty face
Don’t ask too much the same
‘Cause this is just a game

It’s a beautiful lie
It’s a perfect denial
Such a beautiful lie to believe in
So beautiful, beautiful lie makes me
Lie, beautiful, oh

Everyone’s looking at me
I’m running ’round in circles
Plagued with a quiet desperation’s building higher
I’ve got to remember this is just a game

So beautiful, beautiful
It’s a beautiful lie
So beautiful, beautiful
It’s a beautiful lie

So beautiful, beautiful
It’s a beautiful lie
So beautiful, beautiful
It’s a beautiful lie

It’s a beautiful lie
It’s a perfect denial
Such a beautiful lie to believe in
So beautiful, beautiful lie makes me


Did you fall for the Beautiful Lie to? 

 

 

Are you there? Are you aching inside? Do you want more? Do you want magic? Do you want to find you again? Do you want to help him find his strength again? We all want a leader…. We want to be taken care of… We want used for his pleasure and appreciated for our submission. Find your strength on your knees.

This lie is not heard by all… Just some chosen ones… like me.

 

 

Find your submissive here, on subMrs… Your Dominant on husDOM.com .

 

Can’t wait to hear from you… Little Kaninchen

 

PLAYLIST ALERT! Put this song on your playtime playlist!

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  1. I hope I’ll think of a more coherent reply later, but on my first read, all I can say is “wow” and “thank you.” The burning pit in my stomach belies how much your words speak to my heart. While my marriage also included uglier elements, its decline began with that beautiful lie. I became the robotic house slave (and I don’t mean slave in that lovely D/s dynamic way). As life slipped by, I realized I longed for a leader, and I longed to be treasured for my unflagging submission and support. It ended in bitter divorce. But life began again with Sir… life began again when I escaped the lie.

    1. You gave me chills.. Your words touch me as well. I am so happy that you found your way and the fact I can be a small piece of it … humbles me. BIG HUGS! Thank you for commenting! LK

  2. Thank you for this post! Before we found D/s, we were on the fast track to being two ships that passed in the night. We rarely communicated, sex was pretty vanilla and nonexistent. We were both miserable. Our entire little family was miserable. We had a passion in the beginning that I thought only existed in stories and the movies. Seventeen years later and we had lost all of that. We fought all the time. We had a vicious cycle that was very destructive. Each time we fought, both of us felt worse than we did before. As sir would say, we were in a very bad place. Now, there is strength in our marriage and we feel closer than ever.

    1. This is all too common of a story I hear almost daily. It makes me smile when you all get on here and find yourself and save your marriages. I have found a way to make it work and I am so happy to help others find it!

      XOXOX LK

  3. So grateful for those reminders to step back from the Beautiful Lie we are fed and remember what is most important, re prioritize and make sure we feeding with our time and energy those things that will fill us inside and bloom to the outside. All those extra details will work themselves out, if we remember to focus and place first in our lives those relationships that matter most.
    For years, Beast and I were happily married, trying to do the best we could with what we knew. Our vanilla marriage would be good and then be bad, we would come together and try to figure out what we needed in order to make it better again. Walls were built to hide the hurt we were causing one another. It seemed like a constant loosing cycle. We were working on our relationship, willing to always work, but still disappointed because we felt like we were still falling short. We knew we were missing something in our relationship, but could not put a finger on exactly what would be the key to open the door.
    I was so very grateful to be doing some searching online, during one of our relationship bumps, trying to find some answers and coming across Husdom’s site. From what I could read and see (not being a Dom, I did not register on the site), I really wanted to learn more. I brought it to Beast and we soon realized this might be what we were missing. Within a couple weeks, we read lots, had lots of downtime, wrote rules, and scheduled a weekend get away for formal acceptance.
    I love being my Beast’s submissive. I love serving him. And I love what I have accepted in me through this process. Walls have been broken down and we know we have found what we were missing. D/s was the key to opening that door for us.
    Thankyou LK and Husdom again for the work you put into your sites. For guiding us in our D/s and being an instrument for good.

  4. Kytcha,
    It sounds like you and Beast are strong people. I admire your surviving the frustrating and hurtful times. It’s wonderful that you and he found this lifestyle together. I think you hit an important piece when you talk about finding the things that fill you on the inside and make you bloom. To me, much of this D/s relationship is about my growth as a person and my inner peace. I’m rapidly approaching 50, and I can finally shut out the chaos of “shoulds” that were always running through my mind. You are so right that LK and Mr. Fox are instruments for good!

  5. Thanks for giving us such a personal insight LK. It is truly appreciated!
    The Beautiful Lie caught me too. This is my first marriage but Sir’s second. We agreed in the beginning that it would be both of our last, but with time and the daily struggles of life and family, I feel like we were just going through the motions. We rarely fought, instead we would just try to ignore our irritations with each other. The kids were always the priority, so that made ignoring a whole lot easier. I know I still loved him, but was I still IN love with him? …that was the question I was asking myself just a few months ago. I never wanted to ask for a divorce, but also knew that I could not continue like that any longer. This process has helped our relationship do a complete 180! It’s not always been easy, sometimes very frustrating, but I keep fighting through those frustrations and slip ups…my marriage is worth the fight. I was not going to be another statistic in this area of life that has become too disposable in this day and age. I was not going to put my children through what I went through being a child of divorce. I was going to look at the ugly truth and shatter the beautiful lie so Sir and I could build back our Happily Ever After!