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Starting Over?
I need some advice. This will likely be a long post, but I’ll do my best to keep from ramblings.
I’m 26, I’ve been with my husband for 10 years (high school sweethearts!), married for 7.5 years. We have a five year old son. We’ve been in a 24/7 D/s relationship for 6 months (super new to this), but it’s been difficult staying in that and not slipping back to old habits. We have a weekly couch date (down time) and over the past few months we’ve both expressed how hard it is to break habits. We’ve been together for so long that it’s hard to change.
I wanted this since we got together, but didn’t express it until last year because he never seemed the type to be interested, but he is and he wants it too. I don’t know how to break the habits and I need advice or suggestions.
I know we’re different people than we were when we first started dating, or got married, or even since we had our son. And part of me suppresses the changes in myself because it’s not who he fell in love with. I expressed this worry during our last couch date, that he might not love this new version of me and he quickly squashed that worry, which was what I needed to hear. I just don’t know how to help him now. Part of me thinks we need to start over. Get to know the new people we are. Is that even possible? How would we do that? Go on dates and a text each other like we’re just dating? Is that even a good idea? I don’t know what to do or how to help us progress. Any insight ladies?
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2 Replies
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HUGZZZZ to you !!! WELCOME ! CHEERS to you for sharing a honest happening in your marriage D/s ! You will get a Ton of Sub-PORT here !!
a share from Curvey (+ I’m going to send you a little PM note 🙂
>>>>>YES YES YES YES ABSOLUTELY I’m answering all your questions!!!! Maybe lets call it a re-commitment , a clean new better way of your dynamics, re-BOOT and LOVE !!
Live D.sM Happily Ever After
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HisLady,
So I am not sure what exactly these habits are that you are having a hard time breaking but it sounds like you both may need more downtime than just once a week. Maybe try and have downtime once a night or every other night to start discussing what it is that is new that may or may not be a good thing for your marriage and dynamic. Everybody grows and changes some in a marriage so I am sure some of this may have to do with just that. No one is the same person at 16 years of age that they are at 26. That is a big difference! I am sure your Sir would agree and say He is also different now then when you both were in high school. I dont think you need to start over, but having date nights are NEVER a bad idea! 🙂 Date nights to get to know each other even as you both grow older is always a great thing. Growing together (as it seems you both are doing) is part of marriage and this dynamic added in helps to grow you both closer together all at the same time. If you want to share the habits you are worried about, feel free to message me anytime. But reguardless of any of them, if you both talk openly and honestly about how it makes you feel you will both learn to navigate this course together. Hope this helps!
~KLB
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