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PTSD and submission….
It is not new that I deal with PTSD and have been doing wonderful at coping for years now. We learned my triggers and avoided them or made a work-a-round so that I could still be “normal”. I even had a job outside of the house a few hours a week. Life was good.
Well it turns out we missed a trigger, face mask. Because of my past there were things that Sir just avoided and placing his hand over my mouth was one of them, to the point we didn’t really think about it. Well I got called to go back to work and as soon as I put that mask on I knew it was going to be a long day, 34 minutes later I am in full panic attack with flashbacks. Sir had driven me that morning and so glad of that because I wouldn’t have been in a state to drive at all.
This has caused many setbacks and not even sure if I will be able to return to work at all right now. However the silver lining, Sir knew what to do and I didn’t question him. It didn’t matter how scared I was because I knew he had me. The first time of dealing with all this PTSD was so difficult, and at times I wasn’t sure how I was going to survive it. Today I know without a doubt I will survive, it will take some time but Sir will not let me fail or be alone. There have been times I am thankful for this thing we do but evermore than right now.
Sir has even arranged for us to have alone time over the summer by finding someone willing to take on the children so we can work on making me feel safe in the world again. One step forward and two steps back at times but we are moving.
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1 Reply
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sirgift, I understand PTSD. I experienced a loss of my mother in a very traumatic way. I was not even able to see an ambulance w/o completely shutting down. My Sir was there for me and never left my side. I know that it affected my submissive mind set and has taken some time to get back to the lady I was before the loss. (this was over a year ago that it happened) I find that being my Sirs lady, keeps me safe and protected.
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