• Pregnancy and D/s-M

    Posted by hdk on at

    Written by my Sir on husDom.com

    First, to clarify, My darling khaleesi and I are not expecting, but, having another child has been a heavily discussed topic for the last couple months.

    We have just recently began our D/s-M relationship and everything is all so new to us. dk is more than a bedroom submissive but we are not 24/7 yet. Right now it is more like 24/3. My question is:

    How does being pregnant effect the D/s-M relationship?

    It is a very broad questions and I am looking for any incite or even just a story about being pregnant in a D/s-M relationship.

    collette replied 10 years, 1 month ago 5 Members · 8 Replies
  • 8 Replies
  • ssb

    Member
    at

    This is a great question I think. Unfortunately, I dont think I can offer and insight. My Sir and I are hoping to get pregnant later this year though. We weren’t in a D/s relationship the first time I was prego.
    I’m looking forward to it though. I honestly don’t think that much would change for us.

  • collette

    Member
    at

    This reply is coming in rather late, but I’d like to offer my perspective. I’m currently 40 weeks, due any day and for the last two years or so we’ve been slowly weaving a more formal D/s relationship into our dynamic. When I became pregnant it really took off – and perhaps that’s due to hormone rush?

    My dh treats me as he always would, with just a little more care and thoughtfulness considering my condition. We’ve not gotten into much in the way of shibari bondage or something that may be overly complicated (mostly because we aren’t trained for it yet) but we do simple bondage and various positions just fine, as long as it’s not for an extended period of time. I just have to communicate how I’m doing.

    There isn’t anything we haven’t done that we’ve wanted to try except for OTK spankings (which, obviously won’t work right now… LOL). Though he will have me get on all fours on the bed to whip me. He just puts pillows under my tummy for some extra support. He still uses implements such as crop, whip, belt, etc. and it hasn’t been any kind of issue. 🙂 Nipple play has gotten me so much more sore than normal though. Since we’re so close to the birth and because I’ll be breastfeeding he’s toned down that form of play so that I’m not sore and bruised. He hasn’t given it up – he’s just toned it down. When it comes to Service he’s extra careful of my knees and how long I kneel and he arranges an extra supportive pillow for kneeling and helps me up, forgives my clumsiness and lack of grace, etc.

    For us a lot of the actual dynamic of D/s is new to us but we’ve incorporated quite a bit in the last year and the pregnancy hasn’t been any kind of issue. Many women wind up with a hormone rush that increases the libido considerably and we took full advantage of it using this new dynamic. We aren’t 24/7 – we work around his very busy schedule which leaves us one or two nights a week. He’ll plan an in-depth play session once or twice a month right now, but he still manages to work on the fly when he has an unexpected night off and we get the children to bed in good time. As long as I’m not too fatigued (and sometimes even when I am quite tired) we make an effort and it has paid off.

    As SSB states above, not much changed for us. Being pregnant, in my case, didn’t present any restrictions on what we could or couldn’t do. We did what we wanted and because of the libido boost my response was incredibly heightened and I enjoyed it more than I might have otherwise.

    Being due this Sunday hasn’t stopped much. We did an impromptu scene last night that lasted almost 5 hours, an hour and half of which was on my knees doing various forms of service while he made phone calls to family. I was exhausted when we were done and I’m certainly sore today, but I woke up dreaming about it. At this point I couldn’t imagine pregnancy being an issue with this dynamic unless it’s a medical reason.

    I hope that helps!

    • ssb

      Member
      at

      Congratulations Collette! I hope yall are so happy with your new baby!

      Thanks for this response. It’s really given me some new insight for when we finally decide to have a second child. Personally, I can’t wait… I’m looking forward to a kinky conception and taking our journey even further…

      Thanks again for this response! I’ll be showing it to my Sir…

      ♡SSB

      • collette

        Member
        at

        Thank you, SSB. We’re enjoying him bunches. So cute!

        I hope the info helps and good luck to you. 🙂

  • Unknown Member

    Deleted User
    at

    I am just catching up on the forum. I am 11 weeks now and the doc okd Os and sex. All mine are high risk and the shop may possibly close in another 7 weeks. This is my first preg. as D/s (not 24/7). He is just like he was last time around…considerate, kind, responsible. I am tired a lot and he holds me, he likes to watch me in the shower and do my hair. I don’t let him do these things normally, so he enjoys them now. We play abt once a week – no rope, no hard spanking, and very light nipple play. I will update you as I go into 2nd trimester.

    • collette

      Member
      at

      Congratulations, Arwen. 🙂 It will be interesting to follow the thread to see how things work for you and your Sir.

  • nskay

    Member
    at

    This is a good topic of discussion (I’m a little late to the post, considering it was originally posted in April…lol). I was pregnant when my Sir and I began our journey (though I had started trying to introduce it long before that, even before we got married, but had no idea how….pregnancy didn’t change my mind on the type of dynamic that I wanted). It probably played a part in not getting the ball rolling as much as I had hoped. It wasn’t the only factor because he admitted to me recently that he wasn’t ready and for months had a hard time wrapping his head around it. We’ve since restarted our journey to D/s, which we are building the foundation for a 24/7 dynamic. I digress….
    During pregnancy, a little more care needs to be taken for obvious reasons. As you get farther along, some things or positions will be next to impossible depending on how you are feeling. It’s really just a matter of exploring and seeing what is going to work and what isn’t going to so well. Sometimes things will need to be stopped, where in a “non-pregnant” state it would not have caused things to stop. That’s okay, you need to listen very closely to your body and communicate frequently.

    That said, congrats collette! I hope things are going well (as I assume that you have had the baby by now 😉 ) And congrats Arwen! Sir wants to start trying for baby #3 sometime around the end of January/early February. At least I hope. Unfortunately, I had a miscarriage a few weeks ago (unexpectedly as we weren’t trying yet), so hopefully things will “fall back in line” by then and we can start trying.

    • collette

      Member
      at

      I’m sorry to hear about your miscarriage. (((hugs)))

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