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my story of acceptance
About 24 years ago, we had been married 6 years, had a very small baby, were living in a shitty little house, and working opposite schedules so that our little one didn’t have to go to daycare. It was hard. We’d meet up in the alley behind my office building, me headed to work, Him going home. One night, about 2 AM i came home and found empty McDonald’s bags in the living room, & dishes in the sink. i was LIVID. i snatched up the bags, flipped on the bedroom light and threw them at Him. i yelled something about the mess He leaves me to clean up after “a grown ass man” while not getting enough sleep and having to take care of a baby. There was yelling and crying i don’t think we woke the baby, but we were arguing. One thing we had done, even back then, was that we would call a halt to arguments (and there were many then) and go to bed. We never held to that old adage about never go to bed angry. When you’re tired and angry, you could say things that can’t be unsaid. Well, what happens when you go to bed mad, and start to realize that it’s over? Make up sex, that’s what. This time it was angry, and very rough. He made demands, said that things had to change. i gave my submission, acquiesced to every demanding request. It was about the greatest night we had ever had. In the aftermath/afterglow that night i thanked Him. i think that was a first. Over the next several weeks, we talked, A LOT, about that night. We came to the conclusion that we’d like to try things this way. He would be in control of everything. He told me what my responsibilities would be, and that He’d be checking. i, in turn, agreed to let him have control. It didn’t happen overnight, there wasn’t a magic button, but it did happen. i now have three collars, a beautiful lapis and silver choker, one that has pale blue beads, and a three strand choker with wonderful earth toned beads. i can choose which one to wear based on what i’m wearing to work, UNLESS He has chosen to dress me. We haven’t had a real fight in all these years. Was there ever a moment when i knelt and said, “Be my Sir”? Not really, it was more of a mutual decision. We tend to be more formal now, than in the beginning. Every night, after i wash and get ready for bed, i thank Him for caring for me in the way He does. That’s my story of how W/we came to be in this life.
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