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Lessons from a submissive heart
Well, it happened again. Another lesson on submission when I was least expecting it. Yesterday was a normal Sunday for us. Church, then lunch out with the kids. Several years ago I had a lapband and lost 50 lbs. I’m doing great but sometimes eating can be a challenge. Yesterday was one of those days. Everyone was finished except me and the next thing I knew Sir and the kids were cleaning up the table. (We were at a self serve restaurant.) Then the kids got up and started wandering around then hovering over me. I apologized for eating so slow then finally just threw my remaining lunch away. I was so very angry but said nothing. When we got home I told Sir how upset I was but he didn’t seem to get it at all. I fumed for awhile and then got to work on a project. I have a daily task that I must complete every day but it was the last thing in the world I wanted to do. After some contemplation I finally decided that if I wanted this lifestyle, I wanted it all of the time, not just when I felt like it. So with a less than happy but submissive heart I knelt before Sir, pulled down is jeans and gave him the best BJ he had ever had. Afterward, I laid my head in his lap and continued to play with him. He finally asked if I was OK and I told him I was still upset about how lunch went. He apologized and said he could have handled the situation better. That’s all I wanted, my feelings acknowledged.
I also got a wonderful reward for fulfilling my daily duty so well. So, submission even when you don’t “feel” like it is still a good idea. -
3 Replies
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(((Hugs))) I completely understand. At times it can be hard to submit, but at those times it is usually when we learn the greatest lessons. (Hope that came out right!)
red
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Hi Blue!
I actually think that submitting when you DON’T want to is when it gets real. Following your Dom’s orders when it is what you wanted to do anyway is pleasurable, but not all that challenging. Kind of like the quote that “Courage is not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it.”
I’m glad you found peace in submission. You are to be commended, my dear.
Staci
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Blue hugs
I feels ya on the eating deal. I agree with Staci that yeah submission gets real in the times you don’t feel up to your duties. So kudos for you for not only that but also handling your irration and frustration so well.
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