Keeping the D/s alive during pregnancy

[april]

I will definitely be following this topic, not because I plan on having more pregnancies, but because I loved being pregnant soo much, other than since starting our D/s-M journey have I ever felt soo feminine and sexy, as hard as that is for many to believe, when I think back to my 2 pregnancies I don’t think keeping the D/s alive would have been too much of a stretch, however recovery and most of the baby’s first year would have been tougher for me… This being said enjoy getting pregnant D/s style !!! (hugs) ;o)

[ssb]

Awesome Nskay!!! D/s is definitely alive and well in pregnancy! The biggest hurdle for us was the nausea that was ever present the first 11ish weeks (thank God for zofran)… I’m 12 weeks now and feeling so much better. Sir and I played last week too and it was so fun and amazing!!

I’m kind of like you in that we haven’t had to take much off the table. Right now most everything is still on, but we play it by ear too.. Definitely keeping the communication going is so important.. When I wasn’t feeling so great we had downtime and we still keep our rituals in place.. My Sir has been a big support to me too…

I’m excited to hear more about your journey into pregnancy! And if I can be of any help just let me know..

Hugs lady
❤️SSB

[april]

Somebody shared this with me on Facebook yesterday, I will never listen to this song the same again, hope you all enjoy, for parents and parents to be

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=niz9FtJIB2Y

[Unknown Member]

Love this idea NSK. We have slowed down now that I am halfway…belly’s getting heavy and harder to move gracefully. But, the preggs has been good because we have really connected on a more emotional level D/s-wise.

[nskay]

Thanks ladies! The topic of D/s-M seems to be hard to find information on and the topic of D/s-M during pregnancy is even more difficult to find any information on. I remember searching and searching when I was pregnant with #2 and finding precious little about how it can all still work during pregnancy. I thought this would be a good way to follow a pregnancy from beginning to end in the D/s-M lifestyle. I think Arwen said it great when she mentioned the emotional aspect. I do think that some leniency will be required during that time through the morning sickness, growing belly, nausea, cravings, aching back, aching feet, aching everything. However, that does not mean that he is not still in control.

If anyone wants to add their own perspective and/or experiences please feel free to do so. Our experiences will differ from each other’s and the more insight we can gather the better!

Thanks for sharing that April. I’ve always loved Semisonic. That was great! (Yay for Minnesota born! 😉 )

[nskay]

So it’s been a while since I’ve updated here, but there isn’t too much to update yet. We have been doing some baby dancing with a twist lately. Sir informed me this morning that we are going to be doing a spontaneous scene tonight. So I’m pretty excited about that. I will be taking an HPT sometime after Tuesday (who am I kidding, I’ll be lucky if I make it to Wednesday before testing). I thought it was a good time to update, because we are both suspecting that we hit it this month (don’t quote me on that as we don’t know for sure). I have been more emotional than usual and extremely tired. So I have been a lot more difficult to deal with lately. We both noticed the road I was on and neither of us were happy about it. So through discussion we are working on how to help me to get through the emotions (even if we didn’t really catch it this month, talking about it will help us in the future when it does happen).
So far, he’s just decided to keep a closer eye on me than he usually would need to. He’s likely going to be taking a little more control over things that are usually delegated to me. Tasking me with more smaller things to keep me more mindful. We are already anticipated extreme fatigue, so they won’t be big things but just enough to help me.

That’s really all I have at the moment. I will update later on when I know more about the progress of things. Fingers crossed 🙂

[ssb]

Fingers crossed Nskay! Keep us updated for sure. I think your plan to help you stay more mindful is great.. The fatigue sucks but you will get through it!!

❤️SSB

[nskay]

Just wanted to drop in real quick. Today was the first test day. I swear that there’s a second line. It’s so extremely faint yet, it’s hard to tell for 100%. I will test again tomorrow and hopefully get a darker line. I’m feeling VERY hopeful 🙂

[secretsub]

Fingers crossed for you Nskay!! I’m following this thread even though I’m not pregnant because I think Sir and I may start trying for Baby #2 this year some time.

[collette]

Crossing fingers. xoxo

[nskay]

Well ladies, the line got slightly darker this morning. Enough to where Sir actually saw it and I’m convinced that I don’t have “line eye” and that is the real thing. I think that it’s safe to say that I am pregnant. I must say that baby making D/s style was incredibly fun for us. And if my last pregnancy is any indication, it should be a fantastic 9 months (my already super high libido skyrockets into outer space).
Tonight we are celebrating the success with some mild impact play. 🙂 Let the journey begin!

[ssb]

Woohoo!! Congratulations lady!!❤️

~SSB

[april]

Congrats, I love following a pregnancy it reminds me of 2 of the most magical times in my life

[nskay]

Thanks everyone! Sir said that he knew it, and I felt like it was pretty likely (I have been super over tired lately despite getting plenty of sleep… that’s a major “symptom” for me).
After our session last night, we had downtime and we discussed a few future things. Made sure to get them out on the table before they happen. For example, we are going to continue with some impact play and I told him that I can’t do staying in one place for too long. So we came up with a few ideas on how to keep me from being in the same place for too long. Another thing we talked about was hormones. I tend to completely lose control of my emotions. I don’t intentionally do it, it just happens. And I had said that it was going to be even more of a delicate balance needing to be upheld than usual. I will need a certain level of leniency in some things, but at the same time I need a firm hand. We’re going to cross those bridges when we come to it (though I have “mouthed” a couple times, which is more than normal). Next downtime, I think we will be discussing punishments and how we will go about them (should I need them).

Speaking of punishments, Arwen did a post about punishment in pregnancy, and I’m going to link it here because I think that it’s a great example.

https://submrs.com/submissive-forums/topic/punishment-during-pregnancy/

Punishment During Pregnancy

[secretsub]

Congratulations, Nskay!!!!! I’m very happy for you!

[nskay]

A big thank you to everyone following and the congrats! 🙂 I took a Clearblue Digital with Weeks Estimator this morning and actually seeing the word “Pregnant” is making it feel even more real.

[Unknown Member]

CONGRATULATIONS NSK! I am so happy for you two! 🙂

[nskay]

So here we are. The beginning of the 4th week. I called to schedule my first ultrasound and prenatal appt today. It will be March 26. It seems like forever away! But it will be worth the wait, because we will get to see more than a little blob on the ultrasound, we’ll get to actually see a baby.
We have cut back on playtime a little bit. We don’t have it as often, but we want to make sure that everything is nice and stuck and settled in there. I still have bruises from a playtime last week, so I’m really not complaining. Hehe. Despite having cut back on the playtime, our D/s is as strong as ever. He gives me little tasks every day. Ranging from writing in my journal to doing a small household chore (like today he told me my task was to replace the light bulbs in the bathroom that have been out for far longer than they should). We will probably be having a downtime just to touch base and make sure we’re both still on the same page.
While I have been incredibly emotional lately (I cried 4 times yesterday…. for mostly silly reasons), I feel like I am doing better with my attitude. I really think that the little tasks every day are really helping me to keep my mindset exactly where I want it to be (he usually gives them to me midday when the little ones are usually napping so it helps break up my day a little bit). I also repeat the SOAP lines to myself a few times in the morning when I first get up and occasionally a few times during the day if I feel like I need the reminder.

That’s really all I have to update for now. Things have been going so well so far. Sir has been so wonderful so far in making sure that I get what I need and what I desire 🙂
Thank you to all who are following! I hope to have another update soon!

[nskay]

I don’t have too much to update here, but I thought I would drop in. I’m 5 weeks this coming Wednesday. I have my first ultrasound at 10 weeks. So I have quite some time to wait. Everything seems to be running very smoothly. He is still giving me little things to do throughout the day to keep myself mindful. Playtime hasn’t happened as often as it usually does, but that has nothing to do with drive. It has everything to do with the fact that I’m a nervous wreck in the first trimester, and Sir knows this. He is taking things slow and easy for now. At least until the first appointment, then I feel exponentially less nervous about things. He is doing a wonderful job in maintaining the balance so far. I’m in serious awe of him and feel very blessed to be continuing our journey while still getting through the hardships that pregnancy brings.

[nskay]

Tomorrow marks 6 weeks. That first appointment still feels so far away (4 weeks and 2 days….). We are still doing pretty well maintaining the balance, but this last week I have felt the teeniest lapse. We have had a few hitches with my attitude, which both of us were expecting. I get incredibly sleepy and am not always in complete control of my emotions and sometimes my “knee-jerk” reactions. I also tend to be very forgetful. I have gotten “the look” a few times over the last few weeks. I do think that it’s going to be time for another downtime very soon and discuss how we both think things are going. Double check and make sure that we are both still on the same page.
One thing that I did want to write a little bit about that maybe someone else might be going through is the lack of playtime and even sex in general. Unless the doctor tells you otherwise, sex is perfectly safe during pregnancy. Even from the kinky side of things there are still quite a bit of things that you can do (just with extra vigilance). For me personally, the first trimester is difficult. I have a super high drive, but I also am a nervous wreck about loss. So Sir takes it easy, we don’t do the usual playtime as often as we used to (or will after that first appointment!). So we find other ways to keep the connection between us strong. Kissing and hugging is crucial for us. But it’s not just the average peck and slight hug. When we kiss, he will often place his hand on the front or back of my neck (on the back he will grip harder). When hugging, he will let his hands wander a little. Then there’s the “outside the bedroom” things. These are relatively easily upheld. I still kneel for him at night and ask permission to enter his bed (the look in his eyes is quite amazing when I do this, but little subbie self just melts). He still asks me to do little tasks for him occasionally during the day (such as writing in my journal or tidying something up, it’s never big things, but him telling me that he has a task for me really helps wonderfully in helping me maintain my mindset).
This is just what is working for us right now. We will keep communicating often and making changes as they are needed (if they are needed).

[ssb]

NSK, I felt the biggest thing keeping us from sex was the 24/7 nausea during my first trimester. Like you, we did a lot of communicating… I’m well into my second trimester now and feeling great and horny 😉

SSB

[nskay]

I am 7 weeks today. My nausea mostly happens all day and then disappears by evening/early night time. So it works out pretty good for us. What doesn’t cease to amaze me is that I still feel the dynamic between us even with the lesser amount of sex. We did do some impact play the other night that was totally awesome. We are having a downtime a bit later tonight to make sure we are still on the same page. But that impact play night was awesome. And very much needed. I am looking forward to the little bit less exhausting second trimester. Even though I predict that I’ll have plenty of belly to have to deal with by the end of the first trimester, but we can deal with that when it happens (already started to get a little bit of a belly!).
I’m glad to hear that you are feeling great and horny. Good combination, enjoy it! 🙂

[nskay]

This last week has been crazy. Not the good kind of crazy either. The girls both had colds, which they gave to me. I’ve been laid up with a terrible cold. Sir has given me space to get better so we haven’t done any playtime in the last week either. I am feeling much better today so I’m hoping that we can have some much needed play time tonight. A couple days ago, right in the middle of all my sickness, Sir surprised me. He handed me a gift. It was the day collar that I had been wanting for many months now 🙂 That has really helped me to keep the mindset despite being sick.
Now that I’m feeling better today, I feel super pent up and the wait until tonight is not easy! I know I’ll get there, but oh my this wait…..
We haven’t had much opportunity to talk too much. I have been so tired and ill that it’s been hard to have a really good conversation. We still kept up on the nighttime ritual of asking permission, and it was good for me to continue to do so. We did have a downtime not too long ago, and things just feel very good. Despite all the sickness and such, I still feel the dynamic between us.

[Unknown Member]

It’s week 30! Things have slowed down on the sexual and D/s fronts, but I am not necessarily unhappy. My Sir is taking care of me and I am enjoying it for the most part. Pregnancy takes a lot out of you physically especially as the weeks go on, and it is nice to have someone to lean on. It also does a number on your body image, so it is a blessing to have someone tell you that you look great, help you eat healthy meals, and pamper you with some awesome massages.

As far as the sexual front, I pretty much ask whenever I am up to it, which was once in the last 2 weeks. It was amazing, but I get tired quickly and it is hard to maneuver as easily. It’s always doggy-style with him doing most of the work. Other rituals and protocols have been suspended. I know to those that are new and considering how pregnancy affects your lifestyle, this may not sound encouraging. When you are this far along, it helps to take the pedal off the gas and just relax. Lk has been telling me this for some time and I really think it’s a good piece of advice. Just remember, is it temporary and things will slow down and come back to focus in about 6 months. In the meantime, let Him take care of you both.