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Expectations & Respect: The Gateway
I’m so crazy in love with my man and he is my best friend. We just have the best time together and get along perfectly. All aspects of our relationship are perfect. He draws things out of me. He’s the first man in my life to be interested in those dark hidden places of my mind. After our first year together getting comfortable with each other I became fully aware of my submissive nature and introduced him to D/s. Oh man, what a struggle. It took another entire year, and almost giving up on my secret desire, to get him on board. Through the year of struggle I learned my Sir is not sadistic and all the images he saw depicted inflicting pain to the sub. If only I had knew that then lol. So, he was actually being turned off. But anyway, let me move forward. I realized I’m not masochistic, so that helped settle his fears when he realized we could do this in a sensual manner, but we still had a struggle. He is a Dominant male, but he was struggling with getting into that headspace. In the bedroom, he kept feeling defeat bc he didn’t feel like he was meeting my expectations. Here’s where the lightbulbulb came on. I googled “letting your dominant lead in D/s” Oh wow, this was my game changer. Three things I learned over the next few days of research. 1. Drop all my expectations and relax into my submission to let Sir lead with His expectations. 2. Genuine Respect for Sir. 3. Be Vulnerable to Him. When I dropped my expectations of how our new dynamic was supposed to go, he stepped up into his dominant headspace and took the lead (still with my respectful guidance) but he knows his expectations are the only ones that matter. My only expectation is to be his. How freeing to let go and be sub. 😌
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4 Replies
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Wow! I can relate to so much of this. Congratulations on your journey!!!
Staci
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“Let it go! Let it go!”
Sorry, I was channeling my inner Elsa, Lol
But seriously, good for you!
Smooches,
V -
I think a lot of us have trouble with managing our expectations in this dynamic. It’s not a fairy tale, it’s real life. But what a life!
(((Hugs)))
Blue -
Thanks fellow subbies 😊💕. Kisses to each of you 😙
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