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D/s while displaced…can it survive?
I am so discouraged right now. Our home/RV had an electrical fire and now we have to rewire it to make it all safe again, the work will be cheaper than buying another one. Anywhos we just got back on track with D/s after so many setbacks and were moving slowly forward again, now we are staying with the mother in law for the next few months while I rebuild our home. I seriously don’t see how any sex will be happening while here, forget any playtime.
How do we keep this moving forward during this time? The bed we sleep on is literally in the middle of the living room in front of a bank of windows with no covering. We did just finish negotiations of rules but there is not a contingency for such an event. - 6 Replies
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I am so sorry to hear about your troubles. It certainly can seem discouraging when everything just seems impossible. There are still ways that you can keep your D/s alive. It might just take some creativity.
Obviously, there are some basic needs that need to be met. Perhaps shower together? Maybe you can find some time when no one else is going to be home and have even a little bit of a scene or some downtime to reconnect? Do you wear a collar? Maybe you could institute some little rituals around putting on and taking off your collar that can be reminders of your D/s? You could start coming home rituals. Since I don’t know what your dynamic is, maybe there are some things that can be done by both if you to keep each other mindful. For instance, most every morning I make my Sir’s tea. It’s a nice thing that keeps us connected and something that I truly enjoy doing for him. When he leaves for work he always gives me a hug and kisses me goodbye. They are just two morning rituals that don’t look like much of anything to anyone else, they look just like kind gestures but, for us, the meaning is deeper.
These are just a couple of thoughts that I had after seeing your post. I am sure others will have some good ideas as well. Just know that the situation is temporary and you will be back on track sooner than you think.
Natasha
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SG,
EEKS , Im glad you are safe ! mmm maybe splurge on a hotel play weekend !
Hearts,
CURVEY -
Natasha, I love those ideas – which are similar to what our dynamic is at our house with two teenagers that are pretty much always in the house. So sweet to just show your love and devotion in those ways, working on the foundations….
I am glad you are safe and well also. The most important part is that you are both together, find areas that you can grow in and go for it 🙂
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SirsGift, we have never been displaced from our home, but for the matter of discussing staying with family for extended amounts of time, we have tons of experience! Not knowing your dynamic with your Sir, I can only speculate.
If you are 24/7 sub, doing things like making his drinks, helping him shower, sitting at his feet while watching TV, having signs you only know (ex. leading you by his hand on your back, touching your elbow, kissing your forehead, ect) to signal a certain action. Small things like that can help your dynamic. Downtime is important, even if you need to get out of the house to do it, grabbing coffee or going to the park. Maybe even writing letters back a forth.
If you are a bedroom only Sub, there’s not much you can do but wait, or like Curvey said splurge once a month! Send your research to each other, talk about your limits, get a kink bucket list of sorts to tackle once you get back into your own home.
Just look for opportunities to grow in your dynamics whatever that might look like!
Happy exploring,
HA -
SirsGift,
Very sorry to hear of your fire and displacement 🙁 Great suggestions from everyone and to just add to them. We have not been displaced from our home, but we did travel quite a bit this past summer – sometimes with our very lovely but very vanilla friends. While we had our own space so to speak – the walls were thin so no real play – though I could kneel etc for Sir. So I can only imagine your frustration! In addition to service type actions similar to the ones listed, Sir would volunteer us to do the store runs and have me ride along and do all sorts of fun things…sometimes it was just to have a little down time – stay connected and let me know if I’d displeased him…sometimes it was wearing a butt plug while on the errand…I think my favorite was when Sir had me use a little bullet to orgasm a specific amount of times while driving through a small town (it actually was harder than I thought b/c I was sooo afraid someone would see in the car lol). If going to a hotel isn’t possible right away, maybe just a dinner out to practice protocols (if you have any in place) or wear something like nipple clamps that no one knows about…
Good luck! I do believe your D/s can survive! And I truly hope you and your family can go home again soon!
princess pea
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Urgh….I can’t say everything is great. We are back in OUR home and not even 12 hours later drama hit. It seems everytime I think we can make a new routine something happens to shift it. I want my Dom back. I am over being the strong one.
Between the fire, children, last wishes and memorial service go wrong….I am going to sound heartless, but I am over it all. Life sucks at least sex should be good.
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