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D|s-M and Technology
If you have ever been in a chat with me, you know that I intro my HusDOM as my bodyguard-with-benefits. If you have already met him in real life, I think you will agree that it is an apt description of his demeanor.
This week, our 14 year old daughter started her first job, and she walks to and from work by herself. In the interest of her safety, our family installed an app on all our phones called Life360 which tracks our children’s movements, and then sends us text alerts when they arrive safely at home or pre-programmed destinations. In the back of my mind, I knew that my HusDOM was going to like being able to watch over me as well, especially since he travels extensively for his job and is away from our family for long periods of time.
Yesterday, he logged on and saw that I was at the mall with our son, and our daughter was at the beach with her friends. He was absolutely delighted that he was able to check on everyone. He remarked that he was going to love this app, and that he thought it was going to be a big hit with the other Doms as well. A few minutes later, he texted me : “I actually didn’t realize how much I truly get off knowing your whereabouts. This kinda scares me! Well, not really scares; but it does reinforce my Dominant tendencies.” I replied “100% fine with me. I love knowing that you value you me enough to watch over me. And since I am never doing anything wrong, or going somewhere other than where I tell you I am, I have no hesitation about you watching me.”
I imagine it would be different in a vanilla relationship, and the reaction may sound something like “violation of privacy… stalking… smothering… yada yada yada…”
I wonder how many of you feel the same way as I do. I feel protected and cherished, and like his unfaltering attention is a long distance hug. I would love to hear what you think about submitting to your Dom in this manner. Would it make you feel safe or stifled?
P.S.—He told the other Doms, and he was right that they love the idea.
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11 Replies
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Staci,
Thanks for sharing this with us!! I heard my sister in law mention that her and my brother use this app (I did not know that until a couple of days ago) lol I think that I should talk with Grey and look into it! I would love to submit to Grey in this way.. I think that it would make me feel more protected and loved! It would also ease both of our minds when I travel out of state for baseball games and something happens to the car and I dont have enough service to call out but have just enough for the location and internet to function.
Luna
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Staci, This is fantastic! G8tr tracks us all the time thru location services in his iphone and I can honestly say it brings him peace of mind and feeds the inner Dom at the same time. I love the presentation of the app you mentioned though how it will notify you when the kids get to their destinations. That is an awesome feature! Thanks for sharing this with all of us!
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Staci,
Sir and I use Life360 and we absolutely love the app. This has become incorporated into our lifestyle as well as having vanilla uses; For me, I like knowing when Sir is five minutes away from home, so I can prepare a glass of water or tea to meet him at the door.Initially, he wasn’t sure and I could understand why until one day, due to some issues with my phone, I had deleted the app and forgotten to re-add it.
He asked why the app wasn’t on my phone and we both realized how much it had become incorporated into the life.
Luna, it is well worth it and it helps with awkward social situations.
I am an introvert and so with the more extroverted friends of mine, Sir and I have it setup prior to me going anywhere, he can get an idea how long we all are at a particular location and if they want to go somewhere else where I really don’t want to go, he can send me a text and get me out of the situation with a request to come home.
For the both of us, both the safety aspects of Life360 and how it can be used by Sir is wonderful.
Staci, thank you so much for this post. We had been using this app for awhile and I felt shy about sharing how we were using it as a Dom/Sub ourselves. I feel better knowing we weren’t the only Dom/Sub to be using the app.
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Thank you for the post. Sir has wanted to install the app for a while now, as I travel in the night to unknown locations with my job often. I however have been adamantly opposed due to feeling
of him having a lack of trust in me in our vanilla life before now. I found no reason for him not to have trusted me and thus I was insulted that he would impose such a thing. I am slowly coming to grips with the need he has to watch over me and if it means it feeds his dominance, it will be well worth it. Thank you for sharing your experience openly. It has given me a new perspective of it and I feel I will be able to truly submit to this with an open and submissive heart.
star -
Thank you for all of the positive feedback! I am glad to hear that this adds another dimension to the D|s-M of other relationships.
Luna, we found this app through my brother and sister-in-law as well! We have never discussed the details with them, but I suspect my brother is a Dom as well. He and my Sir are best friends and share very similar values.
Para, yet another thing our HusDoms have in common! August is going to be so much fun!
Raven, you never have to be shy around here. I always find it fascinating when I broach a topic and find that others have similar tendencies. We subs have to create our new normal, instead of buying into vanilla standards.
star, I am glad this helped you find peace with something for which your Dom has expressed a need.It’s not about trust in our marriage, it’s about protecting the ones he loves. I hope that it makes you feel cherished and safe.
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Hmmmmm…. I will look into this… I am sure the app will always show Mr. Fox that I am in front of this computer working on the site…. My 16 and 21 yr olds, not sure how they would feel about being tracked… but I think I will look into this further. Thanks Staci!
HUGS!!
lk
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Knowing my where abouts has always been something my Sir requires. We have apple phones so he keeps up with me with the find my iPhone app. Even when vanilla. Some would makes comments about me always checking in but I’m like a lot of you. I found it made me feel more loved and cared about. We have worked this into our D/s-M as one of my rules is that I am to call him every morning when I get to work and when I get ready to leave. I also got an Apple Watch as gift because I’m horrible about leaving my phone. That was a bonus for me lol. I enjoy and bask in his protective nature. Its cool to know others enjoy the same thing!
XOXO
Kleine -
I’ve asked Sir about getting me a Fitbit since he and I have been talking about training together for an event.
Is a Fitbit similar to the Apple Watch and Life360 and could it be used in the same context?
From what I understand, the current Fitbit’s cover pretty much everything: Sleep, heartbeat (?)and cycles. Would it have something like tracking as well?
I thought about asking a friend who has a Fitbit, but could see the funny face if I add, “So can Fitbit make it easier for my husband to keep track of me so I don’t need the phone on me. Why? Uhm…he’s my personal trainer why not?” LOL
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Hello Raven,
I am not a techie really, but I do know that there is a Fitbit that has tracking. I have an apple watch and I like it a lot because I can text, call, and read emails. I think the Fitbit that has tracking is about the same price as an apple watch. The watch has an exercise app feature as well that I track my steps, standing and workouts I hope that helps 🙂
Warmly,
Belle-
Belle,
That is great to know, thank you! We haven’t been able to go and look at the Fitbit’s yet ourselves and funny thing Sir talked about the Fitbit while we were out and about last night. Well…it started with the discussion about Life360 and I mention about it being discussed and then it went to the Fitbit.Sir is training himself and it brought up another question of when we are apart long distance ways for him to keep in touch without having to look at his phone. This opened up a whole new realm of discussions.
Fitbit may soon be D/S bit in the future. LOL
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Staci that is awesome!
For all of my relationship with Sir he likes to know i have gotten sonewhere safely. Initially i hated doing it, instead of seeing it from his point of view of knowing i got somewhere safely i saw it as a trust issue. Probably contributed by the fact i didn’t drive the first 5 or so years we were together, so he did always know where i was. He hated the idea of me using public transport with young children alone so i just didn’t.It’s just second nature to text as i arrive/leave places outside of the school run. I realised if Sir hears of a car accident, etc and he hasn’t heard from me he will not relax. It felt good to let go of the big deal i had felt it was. For Sir, his existence boils down to his utter love and devotion to myself and our children. What i felt was controlling behaviour i realised came from a place of deep love. Whilst it’s not an expectation of our D/s-M it’s something that’s always happened.
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