-
When real life gets in the way!
Hi all. This is my first post so I hope I’m doing it right! My husband and I started with this lifestyle in October after a really bad patch in our marriage. I have always known I am submissive but never before found the courage to tell Him until now. My Sir has embraced D/s and is doing lots of research and making so many positive changes. This has brought about so many good changes in me as a person and also our relationship. Before Christmas we had settled into a really nice place. I had rules and routine and loved looking after him & generally being as good a submissive wife as I could. But now in January this is my busiest work month, I’m working crazy hours, 7 days a week and just don’t have time to do all of my chores and look after Sir how I want to. He has been amazing and has reduced my chores to a couple of easy ones that I can still fit in but it feels wrong to have Him cooking and taking care of me. I’m trying really hard to stay in a submissive mindset but finding it very hard. I wondered if anyone had any tips for how to get through this sort of time. He keeps reminding me that we will soon be in February and my workload will ease and we can get back to normal but I’m finding myself constantly seeking reassurance that we wont slip back to our old vanilla ways!!
-
4 Replies
-
KatieBoo,
Welcome ! Sounds like you are both off to a Wonderful start ! It can mean digging deeper, both Striving for this new way together… when VanilliaLand is chomping at you ! We both have busy/traveling jobs too , so I hear ya ! My share …
We make sure we keep our connection …we have certain things that NO matter what we do them, to stay in our Ds. EX. We make time for DT and don’t miss it, we text each other ..Is there anything I can help you with today ? NEVER, LOL stop the sex …quickies work LOL We found out a TEAM , 2 are stronger than one when our plate is full . Once, the storm LOL has passed we just embrace our roles. I love to serve and Spoil my Sir !Hope to chat you in the Warren,
Curvey -
Hi curvey
Thank you so much for taking the time to respond to my post. It’s good to hear that with a bit of effort & the right mindset we can get through this busy time as a team but still keep the Ds exchange going. We text regularly but I’d never thought of asking Sir if there is anything I can help him with by text. I’m going to try that today as I’m sure I’ll get a favourable response. I suppose it really is the little things that count in keeping the energy flow going. It has just occurred to me that this month Sir has been instructing me what to wear more & that is probably his way of giving me the orders I crave in a way that will not take up a lot of my time. I’ll bring it up in DT & ask him.
I’m new to forums & chat rooms but having lurked on here for a few weeks I’d love to get to know people. You all seem like a lovely bunch! I’ll check out warren chat very soon!!
Thanks again
KatieBoo xxx -
Nice topic!
Always remember that you are in a marriage, and that the extra focus on foundations that the D/s adds to your marriage can really carry you through busy and tough times.
From reading your post, it sounds like your husband is acknowledging your need to have more time for work during this month, and adjusting his expectations without abandoning the dynamic – that’s so awesome! I don’t think that D/s is always about the sub serving the Dom, I personally think it’s more about both parties feeding their relationship. It’s just that in this relationship there is a clear leader (Dom) who makes the final call.
When Curvey suggested to me a while back to text my husband daily and see if I could do anything special, my husband really really liked it. Usually he said no, but it was a great opportunity to reconnect during the busy work day and think about each other and how we can help each other out.
Hugs 🙂
-
Hi everyone! I’m brand new to this site. My husband and I started exploring this lifestyle almost 2 years ago. It came about by me doing something that really hurt his feelings and out of nowhere he spanked me. And once he did that something clicked with us. We bickered a lot, would say hurtful things to each other and practiced the silent treatment like champs. Then he approached me about this lifestyle. I am a submissive by nature so I agreed. I’m writing today because I feel like I need direction on how I can keep this lifestyle in front of me at all times. Life does get in the way and vanilla creeps in. When my sir feels like I’m straying from our D/s relationship he gets very frustrated and rather than redirecting me back the opposite happens. Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks much!
Log in to reply.