What is it about impact and pain?

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This topic contains 7 replies, has 5 voices, and was last updated by  Veruca MOD/Mr. Cain 2 years ago.

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  • #22267
     Veruca MOD/Mr. Cain 
    Moderator

    Premium subMrs™

    As Sir and I grow in our dynamic and push farther into the “rabbit hole”, I am discovering that erotic pain is something that I crave and miss when it isn’t present. Sex with a twist is fine, but it takes me FOREVER to climax (if at all and only then if Sir is using our wand and doing forced orgasms….)if the impact play is not happening or if it is just a little bit. It is something my body NEEDS during playtime to feel satisfied and fulfilled…to really release. The pain gets my body to a state that I can feel pleasure that with out it, I either can’t feel or it takes so long that I give up. I get excited beyond measure when I think about or talk about, with Sir, different impact toys, techniques and where we want to go when playtime is here…

    I know that just as all of our dynamics are unique to each couple, so are our reasons for identifying as masochists. So just out of curiosity…what have you discovered about your wants and needs, how your body processes your pain or why you just like it so darn much? What keeps you cumming back for more?

  • #22620
     bookwormbeth 
    Participant

    Registered subMrs™

    I’m a lot like you. It takes forever to get to orgasm without the impact play. It took me a long time to accept that I was a masochist, but now that I have, the sex has been amazing. I know that for me, the pain shuts off my brain. I think too much and I have a hard time shutting it off without the pain. It is also a huge stress reliever for me. Something about a good impact session just helps me let go of all the stress.

    • #22682
       Veruca MOD/Mr. Cain 
      Moderator

      Premium subMrs™

      I know exactly what you are talking about! It’s amazing how much some good impact can accomplish, lol!
      Here’s to being a masochist and proud!!! 😀

      • #24873
         RRsub 
        Participant

        Registered subMrs™

        Just now finding this out about myself. Been practicing BDSM about 6 months and I had no idea this side of me existed. Well not in the bedroom anyways. I’ve always enjoyed pain but in my younger years got it from tattoos and piercings, eventually natural childbirth.
        My sir tells me this is my natural evolution. I’ve always known pain makes me feel alive, but never did I realize what a stress relief it is. I definitely crave a good impact/pain session to let go of the day to day doldrum and stresses. Fortunately turns out my sir is somewhat of a sadist (maybe not a true to definition one), but on some level he enjoys giving me the pain as it relieves his stress. He’s come to crave giving me a good impact session as well. So glad we mesh in this way now that we’ve discovered this about ourselves.

    • #23427
       Lunar 
      Participant

      Registered subMrs™

      Hi everyone, Im very new to this lifestyle and wish I figured it out earlier! LOl
      I can still enjoy sex without impact and pain, but boy do i crave it sometimes! Its very distracting for me at the moment as its all so new, and only after a fairly intense session can i get back to the business of day to day stuff.
      Looking forward to chatting more
      Lunar

  • #26913
     Mrs.T 
    Participant

    Registered subMrs™

    I am discovering my masochistic self. I never knew just how much I loved it. I am like you all if there is no pain play to begin with or during then an orgasm is almost impossible (unless forced with a vibrator on my clit). If Master starts me with a good flogging, spanking, crop riding, ect. then I can cum on demand.

    It is very new to us and I am still almost embarrassed to admit that I love it. The other night after a good flogging Master told me how excited he got when the harder he hit the more relaxed I got. How when I didn’t flinch he wanted to make me flinch (and so begins the decent into bliss). I am so lucky that as I am discovering my inner masochist he may be discovering his inner sadist (Maybe?)

    I am like Lunar, it is only after very rough play that I find I can concentrate. Today it is painful to sit, and it is the most focused I have been in weeks. Master is afraid to leave marks or worse break skin, and I am afraid to tell him all I want is to look at my back and see the reminders of his attention the night before (Am I Alice or the Rabbit?)

    I am glad that there are other people I can talk about this with. Because sometimes I feel quite insane, but there is nothing as alluring as the stinging of a crop or flogger.

    • #27254
       Veruca MOD/Mr. Cain 
      Moderator

      Premium subMrs™

      Hi Mrs.T,
      You said, “Master is afraid to leave marks or worse break skin, and I am afraid to tell him all I want is to look at my back and see the reminders of his attention the night before (Am I Alice or the Rabbit?)”
      My Sir was the same…he never wanted to feel like he was “abusing” me. He logically knows that isn’t what is happening, but it took him a while to get comfortable with leaving marks on me. He is still not comfortable with the idea of breaking skin on purpose and I think even if he did it accidentally, he would not feel good about it. I am a huge advocate that even though we may want these things, we have to remember and respect that our Sir’s have their own limits just like we do. Downtime is a great tool to help him feel at ease with what just transpired, especially if your ass looks like a rainbow, lol! The more you are able to show him that you are happy and satisfied, the more comfortable he may get with it…at least that is what helped my Sir wrap his brain around it, but it didn’t happen over night. It took some time.

      Smooches,
      V

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