Growth in S/m – sometimes baby steps, sometimes full swings

This topic contains 3 replies, has 2 voices, and was last updated by  Anonymous 1 year, 2 months ago.

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  • #30554
     star *Prema/SirJustin 
    Participant

    Premium subMrs™

    So I’ve shared some of this experience with some of you subbies already, but I thought I’d leave the “story” here too. It’s just a little of Sir and I’s journey deeper into our S/m dynamic; the part immediately following our realization that we both wanted to push our impact play to the point of tears…Yikes! So here goes, bare with me….

    On Friday, Sir had announced the plan to scene that evening and for me to prepare myself mentally to push our play way past the norm for us. Naturally I was terrified and soooo wound up. Soooo…That night things actually DIDN’T go as planned because Sir changed his mind about scening and stuck to playing for the night. That was a whole different thing to conquer: the play challenge (ice dildo…need I say more) AND the horrible disappointment I had in not scening that night since I was so worked up and nervous about it.

    However, we had some long talks about it the next morning and Sir planned a scene for Saturday night instead (his decision NOT me topping ). It was a lesson for me in accepting Sir’s whims as they are and not to be so sensitive and a lesson for him in being aware of the expectations he lays on me and what that means for our dynamic and mindset. More set backs and growth for our D/s-M 🙂

    Any who…He went night fishing with our neighbor and told me to drink the rest of the vodka I had in the freezer, take a bath, and choose a household item to use on myself to make myself cum 3 times within 8 minutes! Wtf. Then I had to text him a picture of the item (hammer , mostly for the symbolism) when I was done.
    He said we would be going to the dungeon when he got home, no matter the time. Sure enough, he walked in the door after midnight, told me to go to the basement and changed into his sexy scening clothes. The night progressed from there with a seriously hard warm up with his hand while on the bench and then flogging and 2 different belts while strapped up to the ceiling. The whole night was probably 4x as hard as it has been in the past. And he tied knots into the end of our flogger…To top it off, he wouldn’t let me fall into subspace either, but expertly kept pulling me back from the edge, which made me keep focused on the pain instead of letting it go.

    He felt like such a more dangerous Dom that night. EVERY hit stung and lingered soooo long and when he laid me back down on the bench to continue and later to bed, my back burned and it felt like love spreading through my skin. I don’t bruise easily at all, but I had welts and bruises on my whole right side by morning. Sir couldn’t stop smiling when he saw them, and I smile every time I think of them or feel them. Is there anything better?

    Love you subbies!
    star

  • #30555
     Anonymous

    Star,
    Thank you for sharing your story! Its amazing what impact can do to you mentally! 🙂 Grey and I have not gone to the lengths that you and your sir have or some of the other couples! We are working our way up slowly!! But as I read your story, its like I was living it! I cant handle much pain at the moment but we have barely got into the impact play!

    Luna

  • #30556
     star *Prema/SirJustin 
    Participant

    Premium subMrs™

    Thanks, Luna!
    It feels good to write it down and preserve the memories of these special moments of growth. I only hope it can encourage some others in their journey as well.
    star

  • #30560
     Anonymous

    Star,

    I know and love that feeling!! Your very encouraging! 🙂

    Luna

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