BDSM |Interview with a Masochist- Uncut/Uncensored |D/s-M Lifestyle

This topic contains 8 replies, has 6 voices, and was last updated by  subMischief/Red 3 months ago.

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  • #24440
     Anonymous

    First I want you all to know that Lk had done this interview back in November. I asked her to take it down because after reading some of the comments I felt that some people are confused on what a masochist is exactly. So I’m going to try to explain it better so there is no confusion between a masochist and abuse.

    I want everyone to understand that wanting or needing PAIN is not abuse. Your partner is feeding your need. Abuse is when someone is giving you pain mental, verbal and physically for their own gratification and not with your consent or for your pleasure. In BDSM it under a consensual agreement between you and your partner and the word ABUSE has no meaning here because the pain you are receiving is done with love and understanding.

    Everyone is different and everyone is not a masochist and every masochist is different. I do not like cutting, blood or needle play but there are some that do. I love impact play…the pain from it builds and ignites the fire sexually and the feel of the leather on my skin is soothing and erotic to me. The pain is addictive and I crave it for the reasons written below.

    This is a non-fictional story, re- interview of a submissive. This is her story of how it feels to be a Masochistic submissive.

    My Sir and I started our 24/7 D/s-M relationship on June 4, 2013 in our third month of our D/s-M journey I started thinking about masochism. The reason for that is because I have wondered why I enjoy the sensation of pain so much. I came to the conclusion that for me, it makes me feel so alive. . I think a submissive can be a masochist and vice versa but they’re not one and the same. A submissive usually will take the pain for her Sir pleasure but they normally don’t go out in search of the pain unless they are also a masochist. I know a masochist as someone who needs, craves the pain in order to feel good, to get that “rush” to feel “alive”…without it they become tense, moody and bitchy.

    When I feel alive It’s like my brain and body functions are so smooth and rhythmically that vital things (such as breathing) are only noticed when they’re *not* functioning, or functioning badly. Pain to me is a way of checking if everything is still there, and functioning properly. It is a good sensation to actually feel that your mind is so focused to the rhythm of your heart beating, and isn’t that what pain, fear, excitement, etc. cause. I ask myself… if being a masochist if I will need pain play to increase, I never thought about it until recently, but I think that it does. At least, it’s logical to think that it does. But that is just because it takes me longer to feel alive lately and that it is so addictive to want that feeling more. . When I’m being really bitchy Sir knows that it’s time for a good long pain session and maybe even a good mind fuck. It’s a time for me to be able to let loose all the emotions that I’ve been building up, to just let everything pour out. Sir knows I’m craving it and after the session I’m happy and ready to take on the vanilla world again.

    There are times in which I do not enjoy pain…Like pain from surgery, for example, is not a good one. I don’t enjoy the everyday pains that come from accidents but when it’s done in an eroticized way then it’s very enjoyable to me. I enjoy the sensation of pain because it awakens my body… I’m alive! In pain it gives me a sense of being on a “higher plain mentally” and when my body is not feeling pain, it feels sort of numb. I only enjoy good pain from a crop, flogger or from my new lollipop from my Sirs hard hand. I realized I loved and could flow with the pain… It’s like a mental state of mind you put yourself in where you let go. It’s like a musician that plays an instrument…the musician feels and absorbs the song mentally that the rhythm of the music flows through his or hers finger tips. And when that musician becomes great at what they do, they can do amazing things with that instrument without ever thinking about it…they just feel it. It’s the same with a masochist… they absorb the rhythm and the heat of the instrument their Sir uses. By letting their mind feel and flow to their place where the pain becomes pleasure that flows through their body directly to their core.

    I enjoy pain. My constant question to myself is will it ever be enough? Will I ever reach out open that door and step through and see what’s beyond? Biggest question I have, Am I even scared at what’s behind that door?

    Where do I begin? I like the sting more than a thud so my weapon of choice is definitely a crop. The sting it gives… Like a bee? You would think it would hurt but instead it calms me, almost rocking me into calm. I want tell you about how my Sir starts a scene. Our scenes do not started with a regular warming up of the flesh… Oh no, I will be whisked away soon enough. I want to feel the heat. That heat is my driving force. I thrive in the pain as I sweat and my skin swells. I come from the blows…I now am in my element.

    Sure my scene begins with me being bound by chains. In my mind I am asking please Dominate me. Imagine yourself running forward toward a door in a long maze of greenery, reaching out … reaching for that doorway and wanting to get close enough to open it. Sir is kissing and biting his way up and down my body…. Pinching and sucking until I am out of breath. Just as I turn the first corner ….The impacts begin. Our play, my impacts do not start as taps… they begin as thumping rhythm. The door gets closer the harder the impact and the composition of the rhythm moves even faster. My mind tries to keep up. I can see my hand reaching for the knob on the door. The tears fall not from fear… But as I get closer and closer and just when I am about to touch it ….. it’s way off in the distance again. My mind reaches out to the pain almost embracing it… welcoming it. I begin to drift away. No pain and no heat… But I feel my shield. The shield is the thing that holds me in check and keeps me from going completely into the darkness. I smile to myself and think, should I drop the shield and go further? Ask Sir for more.. for him to take me further and open the door for me? I back into Sir pushing him. I drop to my knees, my hands cuffed above my head and I am begging PLEASE!….. Please!….. please… break me… Take me there where I want to go. I start to sink the darkness is taking me away. I am smiling in the face of something bigger than pain… Just as the hole swallows me… I hear soft whispers in my ear. I feel hands carrying me to bed, laying me down, comforting me, oiling my skin. Sir wraps me in warmth of his arms and holds me until things come to stand still. Sir pulled me back out of the darkness. Why? Why doesn’t he let me go there?

    These marks are my badges, my medals ….. I made it back from the other side. I giggle to myself and ask Sir…..When can I go again?

    We have moved quickly and my Sir is an engineer at heart and uses that to his advantage in building new implements ect… My Sir is no sadist, he is relatively a calm man. Sir pulled me from the ashes of my perils of my past. Sir waited for me to surface when I was drowning in my mental anguish. The Dom is growing every time we play. I don’t know how far Sir will take me, even if I beg. I can only hope Sir will keep taking me to the door……

    LT
    (Little Troublemaker)

  • #24443
     Anonymous

    Lt and LK, I totally understand. I choose to be brutally flogged. I discover more about myself every session. My masochism runs way deeper than I thought. My desire for pain is extreme, and my Sir is constantly checking on my well being during a session. It is not abuse. It is what I want, desire and need . Only a masochistic could understand it. I appreciate the opportunity to discuss it. Thank you LK. I am not alone.

  • #24587
     Anonymous

    Hello Bearbunny, Thank you for your comment and openness and you are not alone. Hugs!

  • #25006
     Jenjen 
    Participant

    Registered subMrs™

    Thank you for sharing. I struggle with wondering why I get really turned on from pain. It started with my requests for squeezing my inner thighs, to slapping with a hand, then a whip and a crop. I still don’t know why, but I know I like it.

  • #25403
     Honey Bee/Bee Keeper 
    Participant

    Premium subMrs™

    Thank you for this article!! I have just recently allowed myself to truly enjoy spanking and rough (to me!) breast play. I thoroughly enjoy it.

    • #25411
       Anonymous

      Hello Gina I’m glad the post has helped you and if you do have any questions just ask and I’ll do my best to answer them. Pain is my pleasure! Lol! Enjoy lady but be safe as you climb that ladder using the number system 1 thru 10.

  • #26305
     HisGatita 
    Participant

    Registered subMrs™

    Thank you for sharing this article. My sir says he feels that he is abusing me if he were to punish me with objects other than his hand. But I love the sting it leaves when he spanks me good, and I am left craving more. How do I ask for him to use a flogger or a riding crop without sounding bossy or making it seem like I’m calling the shots when it comes to it?

    • #26356
       Anonymous

      Hello HisGatita,
      I would talk to your Sir and downtime and explain your feelings to him about wanting him to try using another implement other than his hand. Tell your Sir about the number system 1 thru 10. This way your Sir can ask you where you are in the pain threshold so he doesn’t feel like he’s hurting you. Let your Sir read this post by printing it out for him it may help explain the difference between the need for pain and what it does for us in a loving good way versus how he may see it as abuse. My Sir thought the same way when we started this and it took me to explain the difference to Sir. Abuse is when it’s given without consent and treated harshly with cruelty in mind for one’s self purpose. What I ask from my Sir is given with my consent and knowing that is given from love and understanding of what I need from him with trust that I know Sir will always respect my limits.

  • #34441
     subMischief/Red 
    Participant

    Premium subMrs™

    Before I ever started the D/s-M lifestyle, my husband and I started experimenting with our sexuality. I kept finding myself drawn towards rough sex. Fantasizing about spankings and being slapped. It scared me at first but frightened me even more what my husband might think of me if he knew. I finally got up the nerve to talk about some of the things I was fantasizing and my husband was definitely apprehensive at first. But he was willing to try. We started with spankings first. That seemed like an easy comfortable place. It was awkward at first. And not that pleasurable. So I thought, maybe not. But I kept craving and desiring that pain. So I went looking for any information I could find. I found all sorts of info on BDSM and we started our kinky journey. He got more comfortable with giving me pain and I realized how much I thoroughly enjoyed and was aroused by the sensations I got from it. That quick biting sting and then the warm flood of endorphins! We have gotten rougher over the years as limits change and morph. I love the thud more than sting but I love when he surprises me with a sharp sting! Like you said, makes me feel alive! Awakens all my senses! I am happy to say that I am a masochist but only in the structured confines of my bedroom. Like what has been mentioned before, I do not like pain from getting injured, or surgery or illness. That is not pleasurable. But when my husband strips me naked and smacks my ass while pulling my hair, yes please!!

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