Domination & Submission| Re-Newing Your D/s Commitment

Domination & Submission

~Renewing My Commitment… Renew Yours~

It’s a new year and a great time for you submissive’s to renew your D/s. Have you gotten through your first phase? It has been magic for your marriage and sex was harder and more delicious then ever. As time goes by sometimes things slip… Downtime is put off until next week or your scenes are no longer weekly. Your connection is slipping and you may feel vanilla creeping back in. The commitment is there in your mind yet the actions are not matching your words. The wave length can get lost. Once that is lost… It is hard to recapture it …… D/s she is trying to slip away in a mist.. turn your head and she’ll be gone.


I have gone through this stage and it is not a fun one but you have to fight for this lifestyle sometimes. I or I mean we can NEVER go back to how things used to be. We took a bite out of this D/s lifestyle and we are ruined forever for anything else vanilla. It’s our own brand of cocaine, one that you can NOT quit. I crave the way it makes me feel. I crave the way I am in heat every time he touches my low back. He craves to put his fingers around my neck… He craves to tie and torture my body… I want to see the Dominant in his eyes. I want his sweat pooling on my back again.  I have to see those eyes, my Dominant’s eyes. He wants me on my knees … Can I be that still? I have to feed him with my submission… to make him stronger. In turn making us and our lifestyle stronger.






Where were we now, we asked ourselves. How bad do we still want this? We both made that decision… More then our next breath. Sir decided he would love me harder… I asked him to love me harder… Love my heart, my mind and my body HARDER. Sir will take me higher…  I will keep up on my submission. We renewed our commitment.


We had put to much in at this point to even think about quitting. We have been out here on the web for almost 3 yrs. now and there were not any married sites still going after the two year mark. WOW… It’s true subs… ITS A TWO YEAR WALL! The highs are higher but so are the lows.. They are lower. How can something that makes you so strong, like submitting make you so weak when it’s taken away.  Take that “Domination & Submission-drug” away and you will go through withdrawal and start spiraling, taking things out on the one you love. That’s a whole other post.


Back to you ….. Things do slip and that’s natural. Keeping the Domination & Submission connection is so very important though. You have to keep it flowing. So my advice is to take this new time of year and go back to your basics. Go back and get your calendars out and schedule those scenes/playtime at least 2x/mo. Schedule your downtimes as much as possible… nightly if you can. Renew your Submission, help your Sir Renew his Domination. Go back clean up all the stuff going on in your head. Ask your Sir to do the same. Our minds get cluttered just as our houses do. Clean out the cob-webs/skeletons and make those new commitments to take your D/s another step further. D/s is about experiences.. TAKE THE NEXT STEP… EPLORE!  You get stagnant and you’ll start questioning the whole dynamic. Explain this to your Sir in downtime. What things on your soft limits that you can explore and push. Oh yeah…READ!!! So important to keep being inspired. Read those books ladies it is your coal to your fire.



Lastly, Review your rituals, rules and contracts. Plan a ceremony… Large or small, make D/s yours again!

Get back to it before she, (D/s) is gone. You don’t know when or if she will ever appear again…..



D/s is team work. D/s is work. But we all want a little pain with our pleasure, don’t we?

That’s why we are here, right?

Husbands find out more at

I want more…. I’m not nearly done! Please Sir?


Domination & Submission

Renew your D/s


Recommend0 recommendationsPublished in BDSM Scenes & Play Practice, D|s-M Lifestyle Experiences, Domination and submission Advice, husDOM/Dominant Husband, lk's Blog Posts, Submissive Advice, Submissive Book Club, submissive Inspiration, submissive Mentoring

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  1. This is exactly what I need to hear. Sir and I fell into a funk with the holidays and sickness. We will be putting these words to work and resetting our D/s ASAP! Thank you LK!

  2. Great Post LK!!! 5 months into our 2nd year and climbing out of the holiday craziness this is the perfect time to Renew our commitment.. Mr B and I just sat and had downtime last night asking eachother what is next what can we do to progress forward, we decided on adding 2 goals one for each of us. D/s-M is a drug that you can’t get enough of and I’m so thankful we are both addicted!!

    Following you as my mentor into my 2nd year, you have paved the way for all of us and the roadblocks to watch for. Thank you for your honesty and insight of what a successful journey should look like.

    hugs lady

  3. Thank you for this LK! It is so important to see that we all need reminders, and refreshers. This post inspired me to talk with Sir during downtime about our commitment and taking it a step further this year. Thank you for that. We all are always learning and growing. I love that we have this beautiful, crazy, sexy, cool kinky sorority. Love you ladies! Xoxo

  4. You could not have posted this at a more perfect time for us LK… Sir and I just passed our one year mark.. Right after the holidays.. And last night we had a scene.. The first one since before I was prego.. It was amazing and emotional, but I could feel that old connection resurface and strengthen…. It wasn’t gone… Just had been put on a back burner. Finally getting over this bump we were stuck on…

  5. LK, Thank you for this post. This is exactly what I needed to hear/read. Sir and I had downtime a few nights ago, and came to this conclusion. We had a moment of stumbling, and had to figure out what we need to do to get back on track. It’s nice to know were heading in the right direction, and can see what needs to be done. Vanilla is not an option!

  6. Lk This was a very meaningful post and it hits home. Sir and I started to hit that wall around our 16th month in our journey. Like you say the farther you go, the higher the highs but lows get lower and the harder it is to climb back up. I believe its because we start to feel comfortable within ourselves and slack off of what we know we should always do, like downtime, honest communication, rituals, guiding. The vanilla part of life causes us to have to change our D/s side of life and if we don’t step up and give it 110 % of ourselves to it,
    it will get lost again. It’s addictive and if you want it and it’s who you are inside yourself you won’t ever go back or give up. So thank you for this post it a great reminder to us all that it can disappear if you let it.
    Love you lady ♥♥♥♥♥

  7. Lk,
    What a thoughtful and meaningful post. This was very needed as we are trying to get back to D/s-M after the holidays. We are only in our 7 month of this new dynamic. But w
    e really are thankful to you and Mr. Fox, as you lead the way showing us what it means to add the D/s-M dynamic to our lives 24/7. And what obstacles to watch out for.
    Thank you for keeping it real and relevant!

  8. LK, Thank you so much for this post. I had Sir read it last night. We finally did FA! After the chat on Thursday and hearing about some of the others experience, and knowing how our life is, I just said to myself if the opportunity comes I will just jump right in. We had sexy time and then I just kneeled at my Sirs feet, and asked him. He said yes, and that I complete him. Then we talked some more and he thanked me for having him read your blog. He said it came at a very appropiate time. That he had felt the vanilla creeping in. So thank you again for all you do for us subs. It makes a huge difference in our lives. Each blog and forum post is important. :))

  9. Wow, perfect timing! We had no idea “the Holiday’s” would be so tough on this dynamic. We have let it slide since before Thanksgiving. Thanks so much for the words of wisdom. Odd, how I am feeling nervous again it’s almost like beginning all over again. You are so right, got to get back to reading “those” books. Thanks again for an awesome post.

  10. Like so many others, this is absolutely perfect timing to read! Thank you SO much! Ironically, my Sir is on an extended trip and sent me an email late last night saying he had been remiss in His duties as my HusDom and that He wanted us to renew, reconnect, and get back on track. I felt teary reading His email and glad to know we were both feeling the same thing at the same time.

    Thank you for your continued encouragement!

    1. June..This happens to everyone … and having those tools to know how to fix it is key. The communication fromhim shows his commitment … Thats a high five lady. He misses your submission as much as you do his Dominance.

  11. Perfect timing LK, and beautifully said. I will commit to making my 2nd year more wonderful than the first. Mr. Wolf has found his Dom, and there is no turning back now. We will renew our FA, and recommit ourselves to each other. The circle is a beautiful thing, we must continually feed each other. This site has saved my marriage by opening my eyes, helping me find the words to express what my heart had longed for, for so long. Yes, I agree… Harder is much more fun, and truly addictive. Happy New Year, dear subbies, may we all learn and become the best submissive our delicious Dom’s deserve. Hugs!

  12. I feel my emotion welling as I read your words. It has been stuffed down for a few days or weeks now….you have given me insight to my pain….things were slipping…I did not feel our D/s…I could not define it…..we started over . the answer does seem to be with me…sir finds his strength in me… You are strong L.K.